Pokémon NO

The last few weeks the world has been gripped by Pokémon Go fever.
Being the well connected digital citizen I am, I have been far from immune. Catching Pokémon left and right throughout my day, comparing them to colleagues efforts, reminiscing of the halcyon days playing Pokémon Diamond on my Nintendo DS.

But today I’ve crossed the unimaginable line, walked the path few are yet to tread. That’s right folks…

I’ve requested my account be deleted.
*pause for shock and awe*

Done yet? Need some more time? I’m sure you read that in horror.
Time to pick your jaw up off the ground and listen closely to the reasons why.

It’s not actually that great

Yep, I just said it. Pokémon Go just isn’t that great.

From the initial launch, servers going up and down like a thirty-cent yo-yo has been hard to endure. Additionally the game breaking bugs during loading/catching/transferring/almost any other thing you attempt to do just chip away at any nostalgia that you may feel while playing the game.

But my hat’s off to Niantic, they’ve had a monumental task launching what is arguably one of the most popular, and wide demographic-reaching, brands in the world today.

Riding the adoption curve, while a little naive, can’t have been an easy task. Just a pity the entire player-base was used as their beta testing group.

It’s an enormous waste of time.

Yeah, yeah, I know, killjoy.
I’ve looked at the amount of time I’ve spent in the last few weeks playing the game and, well, I’m a little ashamed.

Sure, it’s not the kind of hours that other people have sunk into it, but it’s significant enough that I can see an alarming trend towards managing, catching, and pontificating about Pokémon that is anything that could be called healthy...

And while I’m playing it I’m not writing.

I’ve witnessed the end of society as we know it

Ok, yes, a little inflammatory, but let me run you through it.

Recently I’ve been walking home from my day job, specifically through a part of town where there are several Pokéstops that constantly have lures placed on them.

Initially I thought, Great! I’ll be able to catch some more types of Pokémon! and while that was certainly true, it was only yesterday that I decided to close the game and look at what was going on at that location.

There were about sixty people standing around, sitting awkwardly, laying about and generally congregating in the space.

• Not talking to each other.
• Not listening to each other.
• Not being present.

It was eerily silent.

Apart from the odd cough, and the sound of another can of soft drink being opened, it might as well have been completely devoid of human life.

The Pokémon I remember, both through playing the video games and watching the cartoon television show, was one of collaboration, acceptance, and unity… not the plugged-in wasteland I saw before me.

It adds almost nothing to my life

Apart from some quickly won nostalgia, the game just feels like grinding away at the virtual mount, expecting one day to make a molehill.

I just don’t have the time to put into something that doesn’t add value to my everyday experience.

Am I happy that I played it? Sure am, in fact, the time spent with friends initially discussing the game has been quite rewarding. But there has to come a time where it no longer holds any kind of reward. For me this has come much faster than I anticipated, but I’m pleased that it has.

If anyone needs me, I'll be writing...